Shopkinsanity

• Posted on 18th June 2015
• in Uncategorized
• by Ashleigh

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Shopkins

I don’t even know where to start here. I don’t know who the evil genius is that invented these things in such limited quantities that suburban soccer moms can be seen doing some awfully shameful things to get their hands on them. I don’t know if that has me wanting him/her to hit the rock, or just hit them with my Jeep.

These things are about the size of a pencil eraser, probably packed full of BPA, and I can only assume are sold at a 7,000% margin. You know why? Because moms are suckers. We will do pretty much anything (within reason) to put a smile on our kids faces (even if that means some extra Hail Marys after Confession). I am a self-admitted sucker. Both of my daughters are obsessed with these damn Shopkins. They have been collecting them for a solid 6 months (which is like a decade in preschool years), they know all the names and have devoted endless hours to playing with them. (Read: endless hours scattering them all over my floor) So being the Grade A sucker that I am, I keep buying more. Picking them up. Hunting them down. Impaling my foot on them. Buying more. Picking them up. Hunting them down…

A couple of weeks ago Evil Genius Inc. released a much-anticipated 3rd season of these God forsaken banes of my existence. I was well aware because Kyleigh had been reminding me about it since March. (MARCH!) So last Thursday the girls and I are at the store, and we decide to see if they had any Shopkins in stock.

None. Nada. Nothing.

One of the store employees was conveniently standing in the aisle. I should have known then something was up; Lord knows you can never find an associate when you actually need something. So, I asked him if he happened to know anything about them, or when they could expect to get some in. This poor kid looked at me like he was having a flashback from ‘Nam.  “Well, ma’am. We had some on Saturday, but we were selling them as fast as we could unload them. We had to limit them to two per customer. There were women fighting. I’ve never seen anything like it! I tell you what; we get our next truck in on Saturday morning. If you call the first thing in the morning; let them know I sent you, and they will hold two packages for you. To receive your Shopkins you must bring the blood of a virgin, Gollum’s ring and $15.98 + tax.”

That last part I made up. But you get I’m saying. I left my little toy store apparition behind and you know what I did?

I called first thing Saturday morning,

“Hi, this is Mrs. Sucker calling about those Season 3 Shopkins…”

 

 

Now, I know I can’t be the only parent (or grown up) out there who has gone to some slightly excessive lengths to make their kids happy. If you have a funny story about what you’ve done to bring a child you know a little extra joy, feel free to share in the comments. I would love to know I’m not alone on this crazy train. Stay sane. -A